after a long time......trying my luck on the blog!!!!!!
zeeeeeehaaawwww!!!!!!!!!!
back after a struggle.....
and struggle ahead.......
finally i guess i took it fr real.......
yes....my life....that its a stuggle....
past few days werent depressing i would say.....
but were kindda in the 'brackets'....
in the brackets i mean ,i dint let myself fall lose.....
rather caught myself learning new........
but the worst was the, feeling of lone.....
even when i knew i wasnt alone.....
with so many arms i felt handicapped....
confused in my mind ,to god i said.....
give me strength give me some more......
coz i dont wanna fight just one....
but,wanna fight them all.....
'them'here is not restricted.......
me,me and me it includes.....
'people' heath n study it concludes.......
hfff a stuggle....hard it surely is.....
to win..wanna come outta it....
but still.....a shell is wat i stich....
bunch of thoughts my mind is wound with.....
a bit low in my heart m thinking of all this....
my soul's naked and sometimes it bleeds....
in this stuggle which is hard ........
taught me..... n is teaching still.......
happy i m with wat i get
be it wounds ,be it sweat
just coz of the fact i know
that the wounds one day will turn to satisfaction....
the sweat one day will turn me best.......

tryin not to make my mind a devils workshop......
yawning baaad,but cant sleep,
pissed,but cant screech,
bored but cant speak.....
hungry but cant eat....
a subway sandwich of i dream....
wanna wrkout but dnt feel....
want some adventure.....
want some life....
wanna flee away,up in the sky....
sleep on the crescent...angels sing a lullaby....

with twinkling stars i wanna dance....

with my fav song 'blue night'wanna chant.....

sitting in the loo with mario puzo's gem....

thinking myself of the don..known don corleone

i rule the world and demand respect....

love,true frndship is kissed on my hand.....

suddenly the book falls frm my hand.....

eyes sink deep into their oyester shells...

after a while....i get to realize.....

the smell of my shit n sweat on my neck .....

ohh maan....wanna cuppa strong coffee...

m sure , too drunk to write all dat.....

..................<>.......................

something very foolish i mite have ever written.......but gave me a lotta satisfaction....the reason is hard to decide.....but maybe coz rite now m actually sitting all too helpless ....nathing to do....or to put it in better words.....dont just wanna do anything......in short getting 'barbad'.quite a lot of wat i have written above are facts.........facts tht have been clubbed together......which actually dont make sense in a pile but indivisually also is something too personal to share.......but then in the end ive mentioned myself to be completely drunk to write all that.....which i am not(....but wanna get fr sure......as thts the last option maybe....rite now!)in order to give the whole thing some meaning.........

bbye ppl

tc!!!

i have a request to make here.....ppl commenting on the articles pl add in ur name along or id so tht some ambiguities can be resolved if any....
thank you.
razul

MY FRAGMENTED STORY

I sit by the window and wait for you…
Those friends I use to play with in the streets…
Giggling and hopping and go there I screech…
A silent tear I brushed away my cheek…
A thought about it makes me go weak….
Yes, there, u guess me right…
Affirmative, I am talking those golden times…
‘princess world’ when each one of us lived…
Protected, cared,spared by slightest itch…
Those were the times to treasure, of fun…
U wnt get them, ur life, how hard u hunt…
A phase you have stepped in to learn….
Experience now is what you’ve gotto earn…
Gold will transform to silver n then to bronze….
U have to fight with ur gutt n become strong….
So come my mates lets sing this song
Of the morning sunshine to the evening storm
A storm that make you hard and thorough
Gives the skill to keep away sorrow
I sit by the window and dream for you…
Not for ‘him’ not for ‘her’….
Just for the time wen I was little girl
In my mothers arms all cuddled by her.

WHILE CLIMBING MY LADDER.......
from "kya rapchik lag reli hai baap,rasta naap,bhai ka khopdi nai satkane ka kya........" to "dimaag di dahi na kar yaar...tu kitna barbad hai...ekdum item hai kya....." to the profanity added tongue...."f*** off!!!u s*** big time maaan!!!!eeewk....,sutta na milaaaa......" n ppl say its just the start....well dont know how far my rick’s gonna take me…though I await the chervolet almost al the time….
My life….i think maybe m too young to say tht….is full of transitions…as u can make out from the way my tongue twisted…….back in the senior school…my life rocked like biig time….tht was the time wen I developed the 3 main interests of my life except the studies ofcourse which was mandatory…..n they were….being a basket ball player….a drummer….n own a bike…..n it took me years to make just one of them real….tht was i became a drummer….a obviously known amongst my frnds…being the only female drummer n all the hype..….Owning a bike was on just one condition if I make it to pec on my own…which I obv didn’t as I know even wat I write smells of being A tiet-ian…..or will start to smell soon…..it was back in my school…where I was wat I actually am….being in the only girls school I was quite quite different from the lot there…..i was living in “the princess” world….where I was protected from the slightest itch….was immature…child like…or the crux…wasn’t exposed to the world……..
the first few months of my college life rocked!!!had loads of frnz…who cared and as a result I was again put into the “protective shell” but slow n steady I get to know the world…or m still learning to know it….n knowing it ofcourse….But still somewhere I get a feeling of putting myself into the brackets of the word ‘mature’…maybe coz ive experienced quite a lot is wat I think but some of my close pals…say i not really am wat I supposedly think to be…..well………I have a few words to put across u n hope ull judge xactly…if m mature or wat I am…

LIFE: A Shade Of Grey
Now, I understand the true meaning of
Life: a shade of grey….
Or maybe most of it is grey...
Is what people around me make me say.
Not for long they let u stay….
In the brackets of happiness n gay….
Not many yours here….
Even yours go stray….
I go sinking seeing the world….
The 2 coined people with fangs out they stare…
That’s what life is my friend….
Where your eyes full of tears ….
Are wiped away with added despair…..

Rickshaw. Also known as a pedicab,a two wheel cart..etc.
Is a three wheel vehicle drawn by human’s sweat…it can usually accommodate 2 or 3 people at a time…
I, Razul Gupta, a 18 yr old…mm adult…yes…. is writing my blog with this label…obviously with certain thoughts in my mind…which m quite certain some people mite take as immature or unusual…
Here it goes….
arree....suno BHAIYA.......
Blend of courage, will n experience life demands…
Be a fighter well versed it commands.
Comparing my life to a rick I m….
Quite similar it is if u peep in ma’am…
Driven on the wheels….
M running on the heels…
Slog I hard…
But paid m cheap …
Passengers come n passengers go….
Sometimes 1 sometimes more…
All have different traits….
Some spell good n some are fake….
Pay u whole-heartedly are less than few….
In da end u find them …yes, but true.
Well…others make ya beg
For the favor they do is make u sweat…
Left turned out to be pure assholes…
‘Backstabber’ is a complement for those….
Every dog has his day ive heard….
M waiting for the day for the Chevrolet my dear…
When the chauffer comes, opens the door, offers me wine…n call me ‘sir’!!!!